Thursday, August 17, 2017


I have ordered two books on line regarding playwriting through interlibrary loans.  I am looking forward to expanding my writing experience using some old and new material. There is no deadline because I am writing this for myself with the hopes that when it is completed that perhaps a small theater group will enjoy performing my work about Mary Magdalen and Christ.  This writing is fun.

Thursday, August 3, 2017

Making the most of life

My former mother in-law painted a picture of a lemon and used the quote, "when life gives you a lemon, make lemonade," it was the first time I had heard the quote.  She gave the painting to my father.  I always liked that saying because it was so positive.

I have a choice as to how to live my life.  I can choose to be happy and that is a great gift.  Learning how not to micro-manage everything is so important to a healthy lifestyle. I am making positive decisions and I am so glad.  I can't live other people's lives.  I have to live mine.  My children are grown and learning to let go was a challenge, but I feel like I have accomplished this to the best of my ability.  I am pleased to have the opportunity to volunteer and take positive steps in my life.

I get down like everyone, but my extreme depression has been alleviated.  I am so happy now.  I have a boyfriend and we are living our lives as best we can.

Thursday, June 29, 2017


In the haze of a spring day, I will hold my head high knowing there is something greater than I helping me along the way.  I am putting my past behind and all the heartache too for today is the moment I have and I am using it to send a song of myself that keeps my dreams alive.  My work has only begun even if my mind and memory are slow.  I am in the arms of one who loves me and teaches me everything. I understand my task at hand and I am enjoying each quiet moment.  I continue to write and maybe one day I will be able to share a story with you.

I am working on advocacy and trying to make my life a difference for those that I meet. I hope you will like my story, The Writer and The Soldier.  The Soldier's mind was regimented and in tack as to how a home should work. There would be no messes in his house to the contrary, the writer had so many ideas narrowing the focus to one idea and containing it to one area was a challenge.  

I am continuing my story off-line and will share it with you when it is complete. I am enjoying volunteering one day a week at The Disability Network in Flint, Michigan.  I am answering phones and doing other tasks as they occur.  This is a wonderful way for me to occupy my time and give back to others in need.  I am hoping to one day return to work.  More to come later.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

One of Many

There is an illness we try to hide
Locked in generations and hidden by pride
A family is devastated and does not understand 
While older members prefer to pretend
A torture and peril rips through the soul
Leaving emptiness, void of a goal
Still generations live on--

But eyes are opened by one that sees
Inquisitive, troubled victim is she
To explore and understand
To somehow comprehend
What is this illness
That destroys the brain
Leaving sorrow, anger and pain--

Surely there is an answer somewhere
Surely there is a reason for despair
But why does a family continue to retreat 
Behind the walls of facades and defeat 
To rise above and live beyond
This meddlesome, troublesome thorn in the side
This is the goal
A new generation holds--

To conquer, to prevail, to achieve
To be as normal as normal can be 
To live with the illness
But not to succumb
To have open eyes 
To recognize the signs
This is the attitude
Of a new generation
To function, to be--contributors in society--

Mental illness exists; this is true
But survivors are many
Productive souls need not hide
Beneath fallacies, masks and lies
Society shuns the sick and oppressed
Victims strive for success
But a world has its norms
New shoes must be worn
God forbid there be an aberrant--

Hell, I am what I am
And what I am ain't bad
For I am me--a soul with purpose
An individual with a goal
I seek truth
I strive for happiness
And God willing I too will be successful
In a world that demands conformity--

I cannot alter who I am
But I can help people to understand
This illness we too often try to hide
That is locked in by generations and hidden by pride
God willing I will succeed
For I am an envoy for those who still bleed!

Note:  This resulted from my first hospitalization suffered August 18, 1981. My eighteenth birthday was August 15, 1981.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Madeleine's Autobiography Overview

My printer is now informing me, I need ink.  I have published every one of my blog entries.  I have created a portfolio of all the articles I could find on the internet from the South Lyon Herald. The Fowlerville News and Views, I scanned a portion of the articles, but my editor has the articles in boxes and finding them would be a task. This is a summary only

Most of my articles from the Brighton Argus and Livingston County Press, I have been informed, are on microfilm.  WHMI 93.5 radio only kept the articles on the website for a short time.  I am going to look into securing the articles from the radio station.  I have not had time to do this, yet.

I have one page scanned from the technical manual DSalon when I worked for System Solvers. System Solvers is no longer in business. I am in contact with every single editor I ever worked for, which is a blessing when I am given the all clear to return to work.

I am creating a book from some of my blogs.  The blogs are also separated from songs. I am working on scanning articles from when I lived at St. Vincent Sarah Fisher Home for Children.  I have met a lot of interesting people in my line of work or as a child, but compiling this information in a tidy fashion is quite an undertaking.  I plan on sharing the names and significance of each individual I had the pleasure of meeting in my book.  I met Mr. Kresge, who was one of my greatest influences, which I will explain later.  I interviewed Patti Duke Astin, who is really named Anna.  Astin's grandmother lived in Highland Park, Michigan. More on this later.

I was privileged to meet Bob Lanier of the Pistons as a child.  I met many other great people as a child and adult.  I was a member of the Girl Scouts, as a child, and later served as a troop leader and Girl Scout Service Unit Manager for three years.  I am privileged to be a member of the Ladies Auxiliary of the VFW as my father was a lifelong Disabled American Veteran (DAV)  my mother was a member of the auxiliary as well.

I believe in volunteering as an obligation when able to do so.  I have taught when able and written all my life.  I am currently disabled, but still volunteering and living as best I can to help not only myself, but others as well.  I was a peer advocate between 2002-2005 for Livingston County CMH. I am learning how to avoid burnout.  I hope to one day be able to return to work as a writer and teacher when I have the doctor's clearance.

For the time being, I am enjoying life.

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Rebel Man Original

Capo II fret

(R)    G        A     E
    Rebel man I hear

    G                         A       E
    You're knockin' at my door

     G         A    E
     Rebel man I hear

     G                       A     E  
      You're doin' it once more

F                        Fm
You claim that you've changed

F                                 Fm
That you're not at all the same

F                   Fm                      
But how can I know

F                                   Fm
Just what is my guarantee?

F                                    C7
How do you state your plea?


F                     Fm
You say you're reformed

F                              Fm
But you've faltered in the past

F       Fm
Am I a fool?

F                                    Fm
To believe you can make it last?

F                        C7
Substantiate your plea


F                Fm
God knows I love you

F                Fm
And how I want to believe

F                Fm
Oh reassure me

F                       Fm
Can you make it the straight way?

F                          C7
What have you got to say?


F                 Fm  
You call out my name

F                             Fm
And I realize how you've changed

F                    Fm
For your eyes reveal

F                          Fm
That you're a man who's been healed

F                    C7
You've proven it to me

G        A     E
 Rebel man I hear

G                     A  E
You're knockin' at my door

G       A    E
Rebel man I hear

G                    A  E
You're knockin at my door

G       A     E
Rebel man I hear

G                 A        E
I won't stop you anymore

G                 A        E
I won't stop you anymore!

I plan to record this song so you can hear the original version.  I still plan to modify based on what has happened in my life.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Creating A Portfolio

When I was foreclosed on in July, 2010, but I did not move from my home until July, 2011 and moved to an apartment where a 38 year old fella allowed me to sublet a room.  I threw out much of my remaining things.  Including awards from Senator Debbie Stabenow, Congressman Mike Rogers, Bill Rodgers, and Representative Cindy Denby.  I also discarded my Michigan Works plaque. Eventually even all the articles I wrote, I threw out.

When I was sixteen, I won an Award for the Voice of Democracy Contest called "My role in America's Future."  I came in second at the local level in Royal Oak and received a framed award from Senator Hoffman and I forget the second person listed.  I also received a $500.00 bond while my parents and I attended a dinner hosted by the VFW post.  I no longer have anything showing this either.

My high school diploma was discarded as well as my Associate Degree from Oakland Community College in Business Administration.  Additionally, I no longer have proof of my Eastern Michigan University B.S. in English, language and literature.  I guess I could re-order all of these.

Of all these things, I pitched, the ones I miss the most are the articles I wrote for many newspapers in Livingston County and the Milford Times.  I am trying to reassemble a portfolio by going on the internet to print some that are on the internet, but most are on microfilm, in boxes or just plain lost.  I am not letting this setback discourage me as I know I can reassemble some of these things, it will just take time.

On July 3, 2011, I did one of my most challenging things and I played a song I wrote to educate our young about WWII and the aftermath.  I received a trophy, $25.00, a t-shirt and my picture in our local Fowlerville News and Views.

That same year, I attended a Poetry Slam and had the honor of meeting Natasha T. Miller.  I cited a couple of my poems there, even though I did not win, I was pleased I had the courage to try.  I plan to do this again.

I am grateful that I have most of my photographs.  I distributed bags of photos to my two kids and my ex-husband while saving some for myself.  All of these things should help in writing my book.  I am enjoying life once again.