Monday, January 19, 2015

John Lennon's "Imagine"

I was living in Detroit and in sixth grade when I first heard "Imagine," by John Lennon.  I remember, I really liked the song, the beat, the notion that all the people could get along.  I guess it is also the first time I began challenging my Catholic Faith.  Being reared in such a strict Faith, even having to go to Mass on my birthday reinforced everything I knew.  All of the kids, that attended the school were pretty much Catholic.

Today my friends over the years are really loyal to Catholic Faith or Christianity, while I have fallen away.  I feel somewhat of a disconnect with them because their postings even reflect their Faith, while mine is simple, my God has no Faith or religion, at least, not at this time.  I feel comfortable with that, for the most part, except the reality is even my siblings and ex-tended family practice the Faith.

I feel I am in a better place, spiritually, emotionally and mentally now than I have ever been.  I feel I am able to express myself without fear of reprisal other than chastisement through words.  I desire to understand world religions, cultures, ethnic backgrounds, regions, politics and so much more.  I want to learn how to be a catalyst for peace beginning within my own family.

I want to not only to embrace the human experience, I want to live the human experience and in my fifties I feel I have chartered a new course for success.  I may not be wealthy, but I feel I have enough life experiences now to help others and perhaps with proper guidance produce a book worth reading.

I "Imagine" me being Happy.  There was a worker at St. Lawrence Hospital whom I really liked.  She had the word "Imagine," tattooed on her arm.  She worked with me when I was patient.  I had no clothes, so she would try to help me find some in their donated closet.  Others were not aware I had no clothes, and I was not good at communicating this.  Sometimes I slept in the back room because workers didn't realize where my bedroom was supposed to be, and I was even kicked out of my bedroom when I would try to go to my bed because of communication barriers.

I was in a terribly vulnerable state.  No one knew of my former successes as a mother, writer and teacher.  I was out of my head thanks to complications from inappropriate care in Pontiac.




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